#INeedHumor

rammad90

Top Member
Jan 19, 2010
14,143
11,623
I'd say the chances we make the tournament next year is laughable.
How do you support that statement? If things fall correctly we could very well be there. UR should be solid, Slu should be solid. However, given solid growth of Bones, Curry, Williams, and Ward, a healthy Corey, and and some help with from one or more of the freshmen we should be competitive.
 

ViCtorioUs

Top Member
Apr 19, 2009
10,624
17,774
A man carrying a viola case walks into a bank. As he gets in line for a teller everyone tenses up. The guard puts his hand on his gun. The officer at the front desk ducks down into his seat. As the man inches forward in the line customers walking in turn on their heel and walk out. The tellers have perspiration on their faces as they look back and forth nervously. Finally the man reaches the teller and pulls out a Tommy gun from the case. “OK, this is a stick up!” The teller looks at him and sweetly smiles, “ Oh, thank God! We thought you were going to play the viola.”
 

Half-baked Mcbride

Top Member
Apr 19, 2009
9,545
18,512
A man carrying a viola case walks into a bank. As he gets in line for a teller everyone tenses up. The guard puts his hand on his gun. The officer at the front desk ducks down into his seat. As the man inches forward in the line customers walking in turn on their heel and walk out. The tellers have perspiration on their faces as they look back and forth nervously. Finally the man reaches the teller and pulls out a Tommy gun from the case. “OK, this is a stick up!” The teller looks at him and sweetly smiles, “ Oh, thank God! We thought you were going to play the viola.”
There are SO MANY viola jokes......here's another

A violist comes home to see his house on fire and emergency vehicles everywhere. A police officer tells the man "I'm sorry sir, but the conductor of your orchestra came to your house, murdered your wife and children, and then set your house on fire"
The astonished violist sits down and says "The Maestro?!? Came to MY house??!!
 

urmite

Top Member
Mar 22, 2011
1,865
2,969
MM's mention of a cat colony made me think of my home defense system.

I have a Feral Tuxedo Cat Colony in my house. As well as a motion activated laser pointer and sound system.

When someone breaks in, the pointer targets them and the lyrics start...
"And the man in the back said everyone attack
And it turned into a ballroom blitz..."
 

MobileMunchies

Top Member
Nov 2, 2013
13,967
40,578
MM's mention of a cat colony made me think of my home defense system.

I have a Feral Tuxedo Cat Colony in my house. As well as a motion activated laser pointer and sound system.

When someone breaks in, the pointer targets them and the lyrics start...
"And the man in the back said everyone attack
And it turned into a ballroom blitz..."
We welcome them, check out the page for Havoc Feral Colony on facebook, LOL. It's a feral haven, here. This video from years ago shows an engineer who goes all out to create a system for keeping the ferals away. Despite being our polar opposite in terms of repelling/embracing feral cats.. if you have time trust me, see the entire 12 mins video, but at least check this out where I saved it to play from, for a good quality giggle). And it truly qualifies as humorous...

 

VCU74

Top Member
May 29, 2017
1,478
2,825
There are SO MANY viola jokes......here's another

A violist comes home to see his house on fire and emergency vehicles everywhere. A police officer tells the man "I'm sorry sir, but the conductor of your orchestra came to your house, murdered your wife and children, and then set your house on fire"
The astonished violist sits down and says "The Maestro?!? Came to MY house??!!
Well, it’s not violas but- on of my favorite songs played in a way I’v never expected to it played.

 
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VCU94MCV98

Top Member
Mar 27, 2011
1,834
5,498
There are SO MANY viola jokes......here's another

A violist comes home to see his house on fire and emergency vehicles everywhere. A police officer tells the man "I'm sorry sir, but the conductor of your orchestra came to your house, murdered your wife and children, and then set your house on fire"
The astonished violist sits down and says "The Maestro?!? Came to MY house??!!
This joke really isn't about the viola. Mostly, it involves sax and violins.
 

ViCtorioUs

Top Member
Apr 19, 2009
10,624
17,774
Remember folks, a good pun should elicit a groan instead of laugh. The previous post is real groaner.
 

ViCtorioUs

Top Member
Apr 19, 2009
10,624
17,774
Here’s an example: Many of you will recall a former restaurant in Carytown called Christie’s. They had quite a few commercial ovens in which they baked a variety of goods including a number of different flavored scones. They would bake them on certain days and store them in a old carriage house in back of the restaurant across the alley. Now, since this old carriage house was antebellum, many of Richmond’s conservationists fought its demolition, even though it was a fire hazard. It actually had a grass thatched roof that had to be periodically replaced by craftsmen from Jamestown. One night there was a big fire and the carriage house burned to the ground. That wasn’t the end of it however, because there is a moral to the story. People who live in grass houses shouldn’t stow scones.